Taylor Marshall for President

One of the most successful grifters and biggest kooks in the Francis-hating subculture of the MAGAsphere–Taylor Marshall–has decided to run for President of the United States.

No. Really! In a stunningly rare, non-lying moment, Lifesite News accurately reports this epoch-making development in US politics.

“Mark!” you ask, “What are your views on the candidacy of a man whose sheer, radiant superiority to the Holy Father himself as One of the Greatest, if not The Greatest, Catholics in All of Time, Space, and Eternity makes him uniquely qualified to govern the United States of America with the same luminous brilliance with which he currently governs the US Church via his Twitter ipsi dixits, his reckless proclamations about this and that, his trust in demons to give him the inside track on the hidden history of our time, and his visionary prophecies about women with engorged breasts that are very, very normal and definitely not creepy or weird?”

Well, Random Citizen, I’ll tell you: I support his candidacy 100%!

Indeed, I support the candidacy of every ankle-biting crank, weirdo, obsessive, fanatic, and kook who will siphon off votes from Trump from the very worst people in the Reactionary Catholic portion of the MAGA cult, helping to further split this already fractious bag of nuts. Marshall will waste the time of exactly the people whose time should be wasted rather than helping them get organized in hurting the rest of us. The more the energies of the crazy and malignant are dispersed in nonsensical activities, the less energy they have left to harm Normals. If they cannot be made to repent, then it is at least good if they make themselves waste time on futile stupidity.

For the same reason, I also back the candidacy of Ron DeSantis and hope that the GOP will destroy one another in a futile, fratricidal civil war with each other, vying to see who is Purest and Most Righteousest in their devotion to flat earth theories, chemtrails, QANON, Pizzagate conspiracy theories, and whatever other bizarrenesses they come up with to fret over. I think it is urgent that they devote all their powers to figuring out if FOX is part of the Deep State Conspiracy so on.

Meanwhile, Normals can focus on beating the Cult in every election–local, state, and federal–for the next ten years so that sanity can be restored.


3 Responses

    1. The so-called sane people who are still dithering about whether they should back out or not need to remember one thing:
      What do you call three people having lunch with seven Nazis?
      Ten Nazis.

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